Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Frat Party

Good pals GK and Susanna came into town for a visit.

They have a lot of Brooklyn friends, so,
in order to jam-pack the fun,
we had a party.

During the party:
a party-goer pulled all my Harry Potter books off my shelf,
and inexplicably stacked them nearby.

Someone hid a half-eaten cookie in my bed.
I discovered it later that night when I pulled back the covers.

I woke the next morning to find crushed tortilla chips
under both windows in my bedroom.

I had to hide all my pop-up books (I have a few)
to keep them from being destroyed and flung all over the house.
They are still under my bed.

Someone(s) disassembled a wire magazine rack
and moved it from the living room into the middle room.

Someone when through my trash and
then pretended to chug from an empty milk jug.

People* (who will remain nameless)
spirited off to a corner and started kissing.

There was unnecessary screaming,
intermittent crying,
countless knocked-over glasses,
and someone spilled apple juice all over GK and Susanna's bed.

All babies.
That's who did this.
A billion children come to the party.
In truth it was more like 8,
but that's still more than I've ever seen
assembled in my apartment.
Or in any place that doesn't have
a childcare license issued by the state.

The damage, as it turns out, was insignificant,
but that party was...intense.

Full disclosure:
It was a really fun party.
Lots of good friends came, the food was all eaten,
and the kids left liking me and James.
The highlights:
Watching Bravia** commercials
with 7 children gathered around me,
asking Tate and Calvin to identify the Star Wars characters
from James's picture books,
and, let's be honest, the cookie in my bed.
The lowlight was wrestling Ducky away from Van Risser.

*the "people" involved in this unseemly display were Van and a lovely little lady.

**that one is the favorite of most kids, but I like this one best.


  1. If I just consider my house a frat party 24/7, do you think I will feel better or worse?

  2. I adore the Bravia commercials!!! Have you seen the making of it ? (seriously, I thought it HAD to be done digitally, crazy that it was real paint!)
    Or this one?