Thursday, April 28, 2011


I have, admittedly, been in a Plathian place this semester. Which isn't as bad as it sounds (with the exception of February, which was Plathian in every negative sense). What I'm talking about is just a dry, slightly ironic, method of seeing things.

This disinterested refuge became impossible to find yesterday after taking two ill-advised excedrin on an empty stomach. I've been off caffeine for months (again), and those two little white bombs hit a stomach filled only with a slice of rye toast and very high hopes. Their mushroom cloud was an all-consuming nervousness that had morphed into a suffocating anxiety by mid-afternoon. My only combat to this is extreme deliberateness. I looked over the homework I did yesterday afternoon this morning. My writing is small and neat and very, very careful. My answers are equally careful, and completely unimaginative.

I have a history of poor medicinal decisions, mostly involving too many pills and too few slices of toast. My last summer in Rexburg, for example, when I took too many ibuprofen on an equally empty stomach, and threw up popsicles for the rest of the day. Night fell and I sent James to see X-Men (I don't remember which one), and nearly passed out moving from my bathroom to my bed. The only thing I could foggily remember from first aid training was elevated feet, so when James came home he found me asleep with my feet up on every pillow we had. Another time I took my brother's anti-nausea medicine after I caught his flu. I threw it up, or so I thought, so I took another. Next thing I know, I'm sprawled in front of my bedroom window in a cold sweat with a fat lip from somehow sprinting into it. Then there was the brisk walk home from the subway entrance to hastily refund some vitamins.

In short, I need to eat more at breakfast.


  1. grape nuts.

    also, we just tried steel cut oats. they're good. they take awhile to boil, but they're good.

  2. Steel cut oats can eat my shorts. Breakfast shouldn't take a Sunday dinner length of time.

    I will give grape nuts some thought.